Apartment Moving Angst

It's Sunday evening again and I'm thinking where did the weekend go?? It's already a fading blur and I can't believe it's Monday again tomorrow. Today it hit me in the hardware store in Chelsea, around 2 pm, when the Russian woman behind the counter told Raj and I to enjoy the rest of our Sunday afternoon. I felt my chest clench slightly and I turned to Raj and asked wistfully, "Is it really Sunday already?"

We had just purchased sand paper and a bath tub plug, both integral elements of our apartment-improvement-make-Raj's-space-our-space-and-both-of-us-happy plans. Bubble baths are very important to me. The sand paper was for a bar that Raj and I put up in my closet today to hold approximatley 1/3 of my clothes. Also incredibly important. We put it up all by ourselves. We also detached this unefficient wall monstrosity from IKEA leftover in Raj's apartment from the previous tenant. It will be replaced on Thursday with a far more space efficient book shelf and bureau. Oh happy day. The weekend flew by because I was constantly busy either packing, carting things to Raj's via taxi, or trying to spend some QT with my mom.

Yesterday, my Mom and I decided to go stand in line in Times Square to get 1/2 priced tickets to a Broadway Show. This is the second time we've done this, and each time it's a bit too much effort for what we wind up with. I had envisioned a relaxing Saturday beginning with brunch in Soho and then leisurely strolling around, people watching, and shopping. However, as anyone knows who has gone in for the whole 1/2 priced Broadway thing, the whole experience takes up pretty much the whole day. We got up, had a quick breakfast, and then headed over to Times Square which was packed. After making our way to the end of an extremely long line, I ran and got us coffees from Starbuck's while my mom saved our spot. I was actually enjoying the Times Square vibe at first. I hadn't been to that part of the city for a while, and I have to admit I am always rather dazzled by the spectacle of all the lights and 40 foot ads. Who wouldn't be?

After waiting for a little under an hour, we finally got up to the ticket booth and found that the only musicals available that we hadn't seen were obstructed view seats for the Producers and full view seats for Ring of Fire. We went the full view seats and what we thought would be a Broadway version of "Walk The Line," complete with cute Reese/June and Johnny/Joaquin look-a-likes, drama and dancing. From Times Square we zipped down to Union Square because my mom wanted to find some dress pants at Banana. That was really an error on my part, because we should have gone to the Banana near Macy's on 34th street in light of the fact that we had only an hour and a 1/2 before the show started. Because of my poor planning, we ended up with 15 minutes to grab a bite to eat before the show. We opted for the only food in site, which happened to be a divey pizza place. Decent pizza, but pizza nonetheless. Alas, not the scrumptous brunch I had envisioned.

After taking our seats in the theater, we learned that "Ring of Fire" was actually "the songs of Johnny Cash." One after another. No drama. Minimal dancing. There were some look-a-likes, 3 of each to be precise, but no cohesive story attached to any of them. It was a bit disappointing for both of us, although to be fair to the show, the cast had incredible voices and much of it was entertaining. The second act got a little slow, especially with all the prison songs. My favorite Johnny Cash songs (judging only from Walk The Line and Ring of Fire) are the ones he and June Carter sang together, and they did a few of those in the first act. I liked that song about getting my loving when I've got loving on my mind. I think the main problem for my mom and I wasn't with the show, but rather that we were more in a "Beauty and the Beast" kind of mood than a foot-stomping country singing kind of mood. Talking about it later, we both concluded that it's probably worth it to just pay the full price to get tickets for a show that you actually want to see, instead of running around all stressed for a 3rd place choice.

Saturday night was a lovely dinner at Doc's with Raj and my mom. My mom had two cosmos, her drink of choice. Since I'm lacking a signature drink, I went with wine. The meal was good, though not as yummy as the meal my mom and I had on Friday at Ulrika's. Now that place is awesome, whether you're Swedish or not. And they sell Swedish candy. Yum!! I have to give it up the key lime pie at Doc's though. Delicious.

After our day of apartment-improvements, a tired Raj and I watched Sopranos and Big Love with my mom, his sister and her boyfriend. Tony's awake!! Has anyone figured out the meaning of his whole coma-dream parallel universe sequence yet? I have no clue. Who is Kevin Finnerty? On Big Love, I have only one thing to comment upon: That disgusting older man Roman with a fifteen year old?? Oh my God. So gross. At least she has an ipod to listen to now. The evening was fun, but over too soon, and in the background of all of it was this low wave vibration of stress that I know won't stop until Thursday comes.

I can't believe I move in 4 days!! I still have a lot to do, and I'm worried about the space at Raj's. I want both of us to be happy and comfortable, a challenge in fairly small quarters with limited closet space. I'm also feeling pangs about my apartment. At one point today, I came back to my place to grab the rest of my clothes. I moved them to Raj's pre-move to get them organized before the chaos of Thursday descends upon us. My place is currently a disaster area, with odds and ends strewn about and covering the entire floor space. Clothes for good will are piled up against the walls, and boxes, some packed, some empty, are everywhere.

Despite the mess, when I walked into my place, all I saw was everything that I'm going to miss about it. It's enormous and spacious (relatively speaking and for an L studio), it has 2 giant closets with tons of shelving, shelving, cabinets and a medicine cabinet in the bathroom, a wall of windows that look out onto the Empire State Building, acres of empty hardwood covered floor (that I used to view cynically as wasted dollars), a bed side table on each side of my queen sized bed, a kitchen table, my bike with the flat tires, two book shelves, and space for all of the things that I have collected over the course of these last 31 years. And until Thursday it's all mine. How is it going to feel to not have any space that's just mine anymore? A very small part of me wonders if I'm going to freak out, but I try to not pay that part much attention. I would hope I'm more mature and balanced than that.

I gather that the way couples live together on top of each other like Raj and I are about to do, is through the powers of communication, patience, compromise, and compassion. I hope Raj is compassionate and understanding on Thursday, and on the days that will follow, because though I am very excited to move in with him, I'm a little sad to be leaving my space. He probably feels similarly.